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By
Matt Pascarella | The Progressive Magazine, March
2006
My Friend’s Wedding
As I scanned the backyard and saw my friends talking, I remembered
the drive out the day before. On Route 80, the cars came to
a sudden stop outside Hazelton. There was some construction,
so all of the cars merged over to one lane. As I sat in the
car inching toward the exit sign, I remembered when my friends
and I would go up to Hazelton to play punk shows with our band.
People would drive by and see us outside as we were lugging
the equipment into the venues and would honk and give us the
finger.
At the wedding last year, with my designer starched shirt
and expensive tie on, I watched my friend get married. He had
traded in his mohawk for a high-and-tight and his leather jacket
for a coat decorated with chevrons, ribbons, and awards. He
was posing for photos with his new wife. They were just married
a few hours earlier at a small church across from the town
park. It was a cliché moment, a scene from an after
school special. On cue, I silently asked, “What the hell
happened to us?”
We used to ask a version of that question after a night of
partying. But this time when the question came to mind, it
was far more staggering than waking up with a blaring headache
and dry mouth, suffocating from the stench of my own breath,
wondering what happened the night before. This headache was
real, and wouldn’t go away with a few aspirins and a
can of Schlitz.
I needed to know why.
After a while I decided to talk to my friend’s best
man. He was still in uniform from the wedding ceremony and
stood in the yard looking out over the hills and farms that
stretch south towards Harrisburg.
"I was lucky I was in Baghdad," he told me,
as he dragged on his cigarette. "The rest of the country
is a mess. Let’s
hope we’ll be in Baghdad this time."
I couldn’t bring myself to talk to my friend about it.
On his wedding day, I doubt he wanted to be reminded of what
might lie ahead of him.
My newly married friend and his best man will be in Iraq in
a few short months on orders from the 10th Mountain Division,
headquartered at Fort Drum, New York.
I looked over at his stepdaughter, she’s only a few
years old, and I began to remember.
Being Seven Years Old in 1990
We would arrive at Fort Drum military base daily. As we approached
the barricaded entrance, the soldiers would signal us in after
close inspection of our ID cards. They wore a thick black cuff
on the upper right arm of their uniforms with stitching in
big white letters that said, MP, Military Police. The NCOs
had their pants tucked neatly into shiny black boots, and their
M16 machine guns hung from a strap over their shoulders. Their
faces were indistinguishable, shadowed by the brims of their
helmets strapped to their heads.
We drove on to the base passing rows of white buildings, and
I would sit in the back seat of our little red Ford Festiva,
trying to read the signs: 10th Mountain Division Headquarters,
Commissary, Central Intelligence Division. The signs
stuck out of the snow like the classic images from children’s
books about the North Pole.
Our small car galloped over the railroad tracks after railroad
tracks as we funneled deeper into the center of the installation.
A siren would sometimes go off, and my mom would pull the car
over. We’d jump out and stand on the side of the road
as the notoriously bitter wind from Lake Ontario, only twenty
minutes north, blew onto our faces. While Taps played on the
base’s PA system, we would salute the nearest flag. Then
we’d hurry back into the car and continue down the wide
roads, passing tanks, helicopters, and humvees.
Once we finally got to the post office, my brother and I would
sit in the car and wait in silence. The ride home would be
just as quiet. Sometimes we would stop at the mess hall for
dinner. It cost only a few dollars, and they gave you a lot
of food. Waiting in line next to soldiers back from training,
I would hear them talk about how they were in the field for
weeks and that this was their first cooked meal since they
left.
As time went on, I started to notice, from the back seat of
the little red car, that the tanks, helicopters, and humvees,
along with the uniforms of the soldiers in the mess hall, were
changing from a deep green, dark brown, and black camouflage,
to the color of sand. There were fewer and fewer soldiers in
the mess halls, less equipment to pass in the car, and more
MPs stationed at the barricades.
The President was on TV staring at me. We all sat in our living
room, waiting for him to speak. From the corner of my eye,
I noticed the pressed uniform that hung on our door leading
down to the basement. Next to it, a pair of shined boots rested,
and a camouflage hat sat on top of them.
After the President finished speaking, the screen flashed
pictures of deserts, tanks, helicopters, humvees, and soldiers.
I realized then why things had gone from the green, brown,
and black to the shades of brown.
And I realized the power one person could have over my life
in a split second power exerted by someone who did not, nor
could ever, really know me and anything about my life. I was
confronted with an overwhelming sense of weakness a feeling
that I had never known prior to that moment. Once again, I
looked over at the boots, the uniform, and the camouflage hat
in the next room, and I crashed at full speed into the realization
that there was nothing I could do about it.
I had just turned seven years old, and in a span of a few
minutes my childhood passed before me. All it would take was
a slip of paper in that shiny bronze box at the post office
to send my mom to war.
I am still a soldier’s son
My mom never did get deployed during Operation Desert Storm.
After working in many different domestic assignments, she eventually
became a full-time Army Medical Corps recruiter.
She believes in what her recruiting badge represents. According
to the U.S. Army Recruiting Command, The Circular band alludes
to the continuous need of the Army for young men of quality
in its ranks. The eagle stands for federal authority, and the
upraised wings and flaming torch refer to the many opportunities
for advancement through education and training offered by the
modern Army.
Recruiting is a vicious business. You have to balance a sense
of patriotic duty and idealism with the reality that you may
very well be sending your applicant off to war. Yet the work
can be truly rewarding for my mom. She has helped kids to go
to college and helped them get the health care their family
needs. My mom has also helped them fulfill their goal of simply
wanting to serve our country.
She gets flack for that – in surprising places.
Last year, she told me how she stood in line in the base’s
medical clinic when a man in front of her noticed her uniform
and told everyone to stand clear.
Then he said, “Oh, never mind, she’s
just an ‘airman.’ ”
She replied, "Sir, I am not an airman. I
am a Sergeant in the United States Army."
He looked at her rank pinned to her lapels and then noticed
her recruiting badge. It was gold with three sapphire stars.
She was one of the top recruiters in the Army.
You are a liar, he said. "You are a recruiter,
and you are a liar."
He, too, was in uniform. He knew nothing about her own turmoil
after learning that her son’s friend was about to be
shipped into Iraq and that it was her old squad that had recruited
him.
"Right now, I am in sniper school, my friend
e-mailed me recently. I
am getting a lot of good training, and I am looking forward
to applying some of it in Iraq later this year."
My mother is once again on the highway,
headed to another appointment to try to get another doctor,
dentist, or nurse to enlist. My friend is about to cross
the border into Iraq with the 10th Mountain Division. And
I feel once again like that seven-year-old sitting in front
of the TV, noticing the uniform, those boots, and that camouflage
hat.
Matt Pascarella is a researcher, writer
and producer for investigative journalist Greg Palast. You
can view his reports on BBC Newsnight TV, in Harper's Magazine,
and at www.GregPalast.com.